Help, Please!

Image credit: Ryan, www.jorymon.com

Christmas is coming. I must confess that although I used to love Christmas, I'm not a huge fan of it anymore. I concur with the Charlie Brown and Stan Freberg school of thought that the holiday has become too commercial. The true meaning of Christmas, celebrating the birth of Jesus Christ, gets a bit lost with all the decorations, Santa, and presents. Plus, in an ideal world, I would prefer it if we could give each other presents as surprises out of love or because of accomplishments rather than a couple of set times each year. However, I also understand that having a set time like Christmas is useful because it might be easy to forget to give loved ones presents otherwise.

Anyway, odds are that this time of year, you're going to hear someone say, "It's better to give than receive." It's one of those phrases that everyone says but not everyone necessarily believes. I mean, let's face, it's pretty awesome when you get a gift that someone obviously put a lot of time and thought into. A gift that tells you that the giver really loves you a lot. In that case, is it really better to give than receive?

In preschool, one of the things we teach our kids is to say, "help, please," when they need help with something, whether it's help with a zipper or reaching something high up or whatever. I'm pretty sure the main reason we do it is because many of the kids don't talk much, and a child wanting something is a great opportunity to develop language skills. Even though it's great to work on their communication skills, my favorite part of this practice is teaching them to ask for help. I don't know about anyone else, but for me, asking for help is hard. I'd like to think that I love people, but the truth is that people scare me, and since "there is no fear in love" (1 John 4:18), I don't know how much I can actually love people. Asking for help further exacerbates the problem because it puts me in a vulnerable position in which I need to admit that I can't or don't know how to do something. It's embarrassing for me.

When the preschool kids ask me for help, I'd like to think that both parties are benefited. The child has his need met and language further developed, and I get to help him. When the child asks for help, I like to say, "Thanks for asking; I'd love to help you," because I really do love helping the kids. That's why I work at the preschool. That's something I enjoy doing. Am I going to say, "it's better to help than to be helped?" No, because I think it's equally great for both parties.

At one point in Star Wars: Episode 1 - The Phantom Menace, Anakin says, "Mom, you said that the biggest problem in the universe is no one helps each other." I think it would be great if we lived in a world where people were comfortable helping and asking for help. It seems like that would be a situation that people would be happy with. Not to get too political, but that's the main problem I have with socialism/communism; being "forced" to help someone just isn't the same.

Christmas is meant to celebrate Jesus Christ, who Christians believe lived a perfect life. It's hard to deny that Jesus gave much more to us than He'll ever receive from us. However, I'd like to point out that Jesus allowed his followers to wash His feet, fix food for Him, and serve Him in general. He spent much of His time serving, but He also spent time being served. I think that's something we can learn from.

One little caveat: be careful about receiving much and giving too little. Many people honestly love giving, but they'll become resentful if they feel you don't appreciate their gifts or service by not giving back.

Here's what it boils down to: why is it good to give? Because of the joy the receiver feels. That joy is shared with the giver. Therefore, I would argue that instead of saying, "It's better to give than receive," the phrase should be, "It's better to give and receive." Of course, that leaves out what giving and receiving is better than, and it's not quite as catchy, but I still like it better.